Motorhead – The Shite Years

Wacka Wacka Week has been called off, as I finally got round to listing the requests left while the Mr H Glee Club was off on tour.

It seems appropriate to visit Motorhead in this, the week that sees the release of their 24th studio album, “Motorizer”. We’ll be paying particular attention to the affectionally named Shite Years, with some gems from the Motorhead back catalogue.

First some history. As everyone knows Motorhead mainman Lemmy, first entered the priesthood back in the 15th century. However, come 1492, he found his faith no longer sustained him, and torn between joining Christopher Columbus on a naval expedition or linking up with an extreme religions sect, he chose the latter.

His adventures with the Mighty Hawkwind are for another time and place, but safe to say he wouldn’t be the man he is today without them. Deciding to form his own cult, he launched the Royal & Ancient Fellowship Of The Bastards back in 1875. However, no-one seemed interested until he renamed the sect after a Mighty Hawkwind song. And, lo, Motorhead was born. Listen to the Dave Edmunds produced version of the song here.

For several years, they could do no wrong, winning followers from across the world, drawn to their charismatic three chord rock and roll, culminating in a mass meeting in Newcastle, which was released as the No 1 album, “No Sleep Till Hammersmith” (eh?). However, like many preachers before him, the Lemster was drawn towards the dark side, with temptations thrust his every which way. His loins and his lusts betrayed him. However, he kept this secret from his flock with only the lacklustre “Iron Fist” album giving an indication of the torment in his soul. Listen to a “rare” [koff] 2002 live version of the title track here

But then it all came out. His chief acolyte, Cardinal “Fast Eddie” Clarke took orders with Pete Way after the truth about Lemmy came to public light. He had lost his virginity to a mad colonial transgender punk called Wendy O Williams. A secret recording of their coupling was released on vinyl to the horror of the Motorhead legions. “Stand By Your Man” is here.

The B-side was even worse (here) and the new Cardinal was revealed as a tutu wearing, ginger Scotchman. All was lost. The dark forces had won.

However, the Lemster knew that he had to put the needs of the many before his own carnal lusts. And so it was, that with the aid of a Saxon, a Welshman and Worzel Gummidge he put the church of Motorhead back together. Although it was a temporary union, the resulting “Killed By Death” (here) was the first indication that his true destiny as our Lord Lemmy would be fulfilled.

The masses may have abandoned the Church of Motorhead, but we believers still harken to the old, true ways.

Buy the new album here.

Watch Motorhead in action below;